Thursday, November 30, 2006

Movement

I'm a few inches closer to school rhythm again, so i guess you could say the semester's second wind is here. I miss the girls for sure, and my love for them grows daily with the 1000 miles between us. It's funny how I notice that increasingly while they are away...it's probably that the realization is hightened in solitude and absence. ?
Amber felt the baby move yesterday! Still only mama can feel it at this stage (we're into the 2nd trimester now), but soon we'll be able to feel and even see the kicking and squirming from the outside. I loved hearing the joy in her voice as she brought me the good news over the phone. There's something about truly good news and the heralds that bring it that causes unmatched anticipation and joy; I have this in mind with the season of Advent nearing. Listen to Mark: "The beginning of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, the Son of God..." How can I (we) ever prepare for a new baby? A new Kingdom?
Here's to new beginnings and the Word that brings them to life...

off to class...

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

#2

Amberly had her first official appointment with our midwife today and everything seems to be going well. You can go here (14 weeks) to see what is going on developmentally with our little 3 1/2 inch baby. We got to hear a heartbeat today...that is such a fascinating thing. There are no visible outward signs yet, so when you hear that rapid pulse its like new life is announcing itself loud and clear! To top off an exciting day, some new friends brought dinner over (knowing Amberly has been sick) and we shared a great meal before i went to class. Bryan and Emily just got married about a week ago, and here they were bringing us dinner...it was humbling and we remain grateful. I'm curious why i'm hesitant to receive gifts (and the simple gift of relationship itself) from people i do not know extremely well. We seem to have a tendency to stay at arms length with people for some reason. I know there are some good boundaries and protective instincts...but i also know that something in us resists sharing life with others. Every time we hang out with Adam & Dru we thoroughly enjoy it (and Morgan is especially excited), yet there is this lingering fear at times that we are burdening people. Do we all feel that to an extent? Maybe it's just that i suck at receiving...I mean, can i really enjoy Chad's gumbo and Meredith's hospitality if i can't simply be grateful? When McCrary offers me renewed friendship and i miss the point, or Fatty initiates a great conversation only for it to drop on my end...are there roots here in failure to "lean?" The list goes on and moves into the walls of my house as i miss the weight of my brother's words, Amber's thoughtful question, or Morgan's "hold you Dada?" I guess it all goes back to being present...truly present...to the Father and to others. Here we learn to listen and receive well, just as we surely learn how to give and to speak. Thanks to all of you who will not let us live alone...but love Christ enough to bring new wine, even where the (my) wineskins haven't been changed in a while.